This past month has had a very high suicide rate under teens in South Africa, and upon starting research on the subject, you quickly realize this is worldwide. So many kids have been struggling with depression since the pandemic started. We stupidly think it only affected adults, but our children carry more burdens than we think. Suicide is the third leading cause of death for those ages 10-24. We ask a few Rebel moms what they would tell their child in such a situation. Or what they would hope for them to already know.
Claudette Spies: Mother of two and a teacher
My dear child ... With this letter I want to plead with you to erase the idea of taking your own precious life from your mind. Taking your own life is rarely an option. Let me explain ... God shaped you so beautifully and uniquely Psalm 139: 13-14 and with fine handiwork in mom's lap, He gave you specific goals, talents, and abilities to have a future, one with an expectation like what God dreams about you Jeremiah 29:11.
The Lord has already laid out your path and plans the most beautiful things for you if you abide by His plan and build on it. There is always a parent, teacher, or close friend who will have an ear for you to talk to, there will always be someone who knows exactly what you are going through now or is going through the same and who can support, encourage and assist you. You are not a mistake, your purpose here on earth is not a mistake, your calling is so much more than you can think or dream. Hold on tight, hang in there, the best part of your life is still ahead!
Seriously there is someone who loves you very much and will do anything for you! Hope you will allow God to lift you out of the situation! You are more precious than gold and precious stones Proverbs 3:15. Love a concerned mom and teacher!
Elsa: Grandmother, Mom, and police force
A mom’s heart knows her child's hurt, a deep hurt that makes you think of taking your life rather than reaching out and asking for help.
My heart will not survive a second time if someone else close to me, takes their life. I lost my brother or the most painful way imaginable. There is no, but no comfort or ointment for the hurt. It's been so many years, and I still cry over him, and regularly ask God …………. Why ?? I still do not know why he did it ………… so beg, come talk to me, tell me what makes you so desperate.
No matter how bad it is, I'm there to hold your hand and walk the path with you. I know you're scared, I'm going to reject you, push you away, and not love you anymore. But I'm not going to, I felt you grow in me for 9 months, carried you against my heart, and gave you life. You are part of me.
You are stronger than you think, there is nothing wrong with you, do not let anyone else make you believe there is. You are a uniquely created man, with so much potential, it flows over you. You're my best friend, we could always talk about anything. Why not now? ........ Is mom's love not worth more than your doubt?
Psalm 139 v 13 to 16 tells that God made your body before you were born, that He made you wonderful, He knows every bone in your body, and you were not yet 1 day old, then God has your name in His book written for how long you will live ………. Do you see how special you are to God and even more to me?
You are God's prince, you are His favorite son, He loves you more than you can ever imagine.
And nothing is too big we cannot handle. Mom IS and WILL always be there for you.
Minka- Mom of one. Stay at home mom.
My dearest child,
I see you hurting! I see you pulling away and shutting down. Please don’t think I don’t notice. I’m here for you! I’m always here for you. I will listen to whatever you have to say, however big or small.
I have watched you hold in all your frustration, anger, fears, and worries. No matter how many times you were told to or asked to talk them out.
You are bottling them up; you are overflowing; you are exploding in pain. It has not gone unnoticed.
You are stronger than you think. You are amazing. You will do great things! Don’t let this overcome you; I’m here!
The bloody tissues have been found. I know! I know you are self-harming! I know you are self-harming because the signs are there. I know you are self-harming because I too at your age was a cutter. I do not judge! My dear child, I do not judge. I do not blame. I understand! I have been there…
My dear child, I love you. I notice. I’m here!
Chantel van der Merwe: Mother of one. After School Teacher
It's never easy. Sometimes you feel alone. No one who really loves you. I was in Standard 6 when I first tried to commit suicide. Drinking pills. But did not know my teacher knew about it. (I was on a hockey tour.) It was the first time's try of 3 ... not my proudest moments.
As a child, you feel as if no older person understands you or can even help with your problems. "Maybe it's easier if I just die."
My dear child. It might be easy for you. But it's not easy for the people left behind.
If you feel you cannot talk about your life and the decisions you make yourself. Just know you can always talk to other people.
If you have no trust in your family .... experience or find no love or comfort. Just remember one thing. Family is not always blood.
Do not make a murder pit of your heart.
Do not try to change yourself to fit in with society.
"You are born to stand out”!!!!
Be who you want to be. See for yourself!!! Just be you! And always remember. God does not make mistakes.
Lehandré Van der Merwe: Owner by The Family Optometrist
My dear child, when you were little, I never promised that I would protect you from the world's hurt and I do not regret it because I cannot. I will never be able to. I did promise that I would be there for you and walk the path of life with you. I promised that you will always feel comfortable with me and that you will know that you can share everything with me, your dreams and desires, your disappointments, happiness and fears, your successes and your shame, everything- because I am your safe haven.
If you forgot it somewhere along the way, I want to remind you of those promises. You may not know it, but even Mom has felt more than once that the world with all its hurt is just too big and challenging for me to handle, but I'm still here. Not because of prayers and Bible verses, although of course, it helps, because I made a wilful decision at a very young age that I would live and choose to stay alive every day. Why? Because there is beauty in the world, there is good in the world, because I may be different but that otherness is what would determine my success one day. Sadness and rejoicing run parallel on life's train track, it's when the hurt dominates the beautiful, that the train gets off its tracks, but what Mommy can promise you is that the One who runs the train always puts you back on the 2 tracks.
Share your hurt with Mom, allow me to walk next to you, hold your hand and hold you strong. Allow me to help you see the beautiful weather
We love you, Rebel child. It’s not easy, we know, but it’s going to be worth it one day.
Please contact us if you need someone to talk to.
Depression and Anxiety Helpline. (0800) 70 80 9 – South Africa
SOS Un Amigo Anonimo 4783–8888 – Argentina
111, Option 2, is the National Health Services' First Response Service for mental health crises and support – the United Kingdom
The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline can be reached at 1-800-273-8255. - USA
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